Newt and me

I first encountered Newt Gingrich when he shut down the government. Republicans had climbed into power. Over a budget dispute, Congress refused to give money to the government to keep operating, so it closed. The city went quiet. Shortly thereafter, I joined the federal service. My colleagues griped. Not only had they been told not to work, they had been prohibited from volunteering their time to the government. It was the paper flow equivalent of a backed up sewer. Later, Newt left for AEI a think tank, and I no longer had to think about him. But, I heard he had been treated for anxiety, and felt sorry for him then. Later, I read he was seen with Condoleeza Rice at an opera at the Kennedy Center. I like opera. I kept my eyes peeled. Surely, I spotted him one evening – Marriage of Figaro. He was with a woman whose blonde-dyed hair looked like a steel helmut. Oh well, we all have our hair moments. That evening I had some challenges with my own dress as well. Neither Newt nor companion looked too comfortable or happy – despite the impending light spot of Mozartian fun. But, it’s true that the wait service was particularly poor that evening. You may have your Tom Cruise, we have our Newt.